Prank Joke Phone Calls With Bernard Manning. Wind Up Jokes for the UK!

<body> <table borderColor="#000000" cellSpacing="0" cellPadding="4" width="100%" border="1"> <tbody> <tr> <td width="100%" bgColor="#000000"> <div align="center"> <table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="100%"> <tr> <td width="14%"> <p align="left"><img border="0" src="images/index.1.gif" width="92" height="100" alt="Bernard Manning Wind Up Calls"></td> <center> <td width="121%"> <p align="center"><b><font color="#FFFF00" face="Arial" size="6">Bernard Manning Wind Up Calls</font><font color="#FFFFFF"><br> The Hilarious Wind Up Phone Service<br> </font><font color="#FFFFFF" face="Arial" size="3">(You Can Even Put Calls Through To Mobile Phones)</font></b></td> </center> <td width="15%"> <p align="right"><img border="0" src="images/index.2.gif" width="92" height="100" alt="Bernard Manning Wind Up Calls"></td> </tr> </table> </div> </td> </tr> <center> <tr> <td width="100%"> <p align="center"><b><font color="#FF0000" face="Arial" size="7">Call Now: 0906 406 8368</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="100%"> <p align="center"><b><font face="Arial" size="4" color="#3127E4">It’s fantastic, funny and a fabulous way of bringing the ultimate laughter experience to brighten up your day. </font></b></p> <p align="center"><b><font face="Arial" size="4" color="#3127E4">Its Easy!  Call the number above, follow the instructions, then sit back and enjoy the ultimate wind up!</font></b></p> <p align="center"><b><font face="Arial" size="4" color="#3127E4">Our special listen in system allows you to listen to the victim on the other end of the telephone line without being heard. </font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="100%"> <div align="center"> <table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="102%"> <tr> <td width="75%"> <p align="center"><b><u><font face="Arial" color="#FF0000" size="5">Some Of Our Available Wind-Ups</font></u></b></p> <div align="center"> <table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="100%"> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">Results from the STD Clinic (Unisex)</font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">1</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">I’m having an affair with your husband</font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">2</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">I’m having an affair with your wife</font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">3</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">Environmental health complaint - smelly house</font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">4</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">You’ve been sacked from your job (Unisex)</font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">5</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">You’ve won a free luxury holiday</font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">6</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">The random drug test </font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">7</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">Caught on camera smuggling</font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">8</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">Woman stalking man </font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">9</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">Invite to a popular TV quiz </font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">10</font></b></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="90%"><b><font size="3" face="Arial">The sex survey report</font></b></td> <td width="10%" align="center"><b><font face="Arial">11</font></b></td> </tr> </table> </div> </td> <td width="28%"><img alt="Bernard Manning Wind Up Calls" src="images/357.gif" border="0" width="200" height="281" align="right"></td> </tr> </table> </div> </td> </tr> <tr> <td width="100%"> <p align="center"><b><font color="#FF0000" face="Arial" size="7">Call Now: 0906 406 8368<br> </font></b><font face="Arial Narrow" color="#3127e4" size="3"><b>Remember you <u>can</u> hear them!! - but they <u>can't</u> hear you !!!</b></font></p> <p align="center"><b><font face="Arial Narrow" color="#ff0000" size="3">AND NOW YOU CAN EVEN PUT THE CALL THROUGH TO A MOBILE PHONE!!!!</font></b></td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <p align="center"><font face="Arial Narrow" size="2">Calls to the Bernard Manning Joke-line cost no more than £1.50 per minute at all times Please seek the bill payers permission before calling.</font></p> <p align="center"><font color="#000000"><font face="Arial Narrow" size="2">Service provided by <br> TalkInPages, PO Box 37, Dewsbury, WF12 9XT, United Kingdom<br> Email: <a href="mailto:jokes@bernard-manning-wind-up-calls.co.uk">jokes@bernard-manning-wind-up-calls.co.uk</a><br> </font><b><font face="Arial,Helvetica,Geneva,Swiss,SunSans-Regular" size="2">Tel:</font></b> <font face="Arial,Helvetica,Geneva,Swiss,SunSans-Regular" size="2">+44 (0) 871 550 0061</font> <font face="Arial,Helvetica,Geneva,Swiss,SunSans-Regular" size="2"><b>Fax:</b> + 44 (0) 871 717 9231</font></font></p> <p align="center"><font face="Arial,Helvetica,Univers,Zurich BT" size="-1">© Copyright 2003</font><a target="_top" href="http://t.extreme-dm.com/?login=bmwc"><img src="http://u1.extreme-dm.com/i.gif" height=0 border=0 width=1 alt=""></a><script language="javascript1.2"> </script><script language="javascript"> </script><noscript><img height=1 width=1 alt="" src="http://t0.extreme-dm.com/0.gif?tag=bmwc&j=n"></noscript> </center> </p> <div align="center"> <center> <table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="100%"> <tr> <td width="25%"></td> <td width="25%" align="center"><a href="http://www.mobile-sms-party-games.co.uk" target="_blank"><img height="65" alt="Mobile SMS Party Games" src="images/smsgames.gif" width="120" border="0"></a></td> <td width="25%" align="center"><a href="http://www.wind-up-your-friends.co.uk" target="_blank"><img height="60" src="images/wnd_up.gif" width="110" border="0"></a></td> <td width="25%"></td> </tr> </table> </center> </div> <p align="center"><a href="http://www.mobilepranks.co.uk/mobile_strip_o_text.htm" target="_blank"><img height="100" alt="Strip O Text - Book An Imaginary Stripper For A Gulible Mate Or Victim" src="images/stripbanner.gif" width="468" border="0"></a></p> <p align="center"><a href="http://www.wind-up-call.co.uk" target="_blank"><img alt="Interactive Wind Up Calls" src="images/windup_banner.gif" border="0" width="468" height="68"></a></p> <p align="center"><a href="http://www.celebrity-wind-up-calls.co.uk" target="_blank"><img height="67" alt="Celebrity Wind Up Calls" src="images/cele_banner.jpg" width="468" border="0"></a></p> <p align="center"><a href="http://www.mobilepranks.co.uk" target="_blank"><img height="67" alt="Mobile Pranks - The funniest thing that can happen to your mobile phone!" src="images/mobilepranks.jpg" width="468" border="0"></a></p> <p align="center"><a href="http://www.amazing-tones-and-logos.co.uk" target="_blank"><img height="61" alt="Customise your mobile with ring tones and logos to suit your individual taste." src="images/ntl.gif" width="468" border="0"></a></p> </body>